My husband Luke and I had a break this past week in the recent South Aus 7-day lockdown. That's right - we chose to have a break.
Immediately, a break sounds like a red flag. What healthy relationships have breaks?
Breaks - whether it's from your relationship, your work, your exercise - are a good thing. They change up your attention's focus, give you a release of the tension built up from doing one activity for too long, and - quite literally - breaks the pattern of what you were doing, to come back afresh.
Considering the intense circumstances everyone has been in - living during a pandemic and not having had a holiday as a break for such a long time - on top of the personal fact we just moved to the other side of the world and are currently living with family, a break was needed for us to breathe, release tension, miss each other and look forward to each other again. We've done it before doing long-distance for 18 months in 2 countries - and we knew it would work for us. So yes, this is a sign of a healthy relationship, for us (and on another note I'll always be an advocate of separate holidays with friends to remind each other that, we are independent too, and it's healthy for our relationship's wellbeing).
But having a break from something is the only way to step aside and reflect on that something.
Only when I stepped away from daily piano practice for several years did I realise its place in my life. Only when I step away from my business can I take the time required to properly assess the current strategy and adjust accordingly.
Only when we step away from something, can we remind ourselves what it is all for.
It's very hard to navigate something from WITHIN. To have full awareness of the whole when you are a part of that whole. Sometimes having someone else - a therapist, a life coach, a mentor - is needed to help you see from the outside.
And lastly a break can simply be a pause. A moment to stop and regain presence.
That's the importance of having a break in every sense of the word.